I decided to write this post because lately, I’ve been encountering a lot of special snowflakes with fragile egos that have been whining about their dating problems.
I mean it’s one thing to ask for help to rectify a problem but it’s quite another to just whine and complain about it yet choose to do absolutely to change the status quo.
Just to give you an example, recently I spoke with a guy online that had a difficult time with online dating and meeting Vietnamese girls in Vietnam.
He claimed that all Vietnamese girls are cold and stuck up and that they never reply back to him.
So I decided to do a little digging and discovered the following things about him through looking at his online profile and also through talking with him.
- He has a thick and heavy accent
- He spoke no Vietnamese whatsoever
- He wasn’t even in Vietnam yet was trying to meet girls online in Vietnam
- He had no understanding at all about Vietnamese culture
- He seemed to lack empathy and the ability to put himself in other people’s shoes
- His appearance and fashion sense needed a lot of work
Based on this, it wasn’t surprising then that he wasn’t having much luck with women here.
But the most shocking thing that I discovered about him wasn’t that he possessed next to no game whatsoever or that he needed major work on his physical appearance, nope, it was his level of entitlement.
You see, when I gave him some pointers on how he could improve his situation with Vietnamese girls such as trying to learn a bit of Vietnamese, traveling to Vietnam, and also brushing up on his profile, messages, etc, he replied “why should I?”
“Why should I need to learn Vietnamese in order to get girls to converse with me?”
“Why should I have to travel to Vietnam in order for women to pay me any attention?”
All I kept on hearing was why should I do this or that?
Rather than make any attempts to rescue himself from his situation and improve his dating life, he just kept on complaining about why he shouldn’t need to do this or that to get women.
Somehow in his mind, he had convinced himself that the world revolves around him and that he was special.
This is even after telling him that English penetration levels were very low in Vietnam and he himself admitting this as well, he still felt entitled to be getting responses back and dates with women because he was a foreigner 🤦♂️.
Even when presented with evidence that men have no trouble dating here and marrying women from an article that I cited on international marriages, he still made excuses and blamed it on the women rather than himself.
But he isn’t an isolated case, I’ve seen more than plenty of men with the same over-entitlement issues that share the same viewpoint as him.
“Why should I need to change this or that about me?”
“Don’t these Vietnamese girls know that I’m a foreigner here and that I deserve special treatment!“
“How dare she not come over to my hotel room at my beck and call, even though I haven’t even gone out on a date with her yet!”
“How dare she not drop down on her knees and start worshipping me!”
“Doesn’t she know that she’s lucky that I even decided to meet her!”
It’s Always Someone Else’s Fault, Never Their Own
A lot of men that suck with women rather than accept responsibility for their own failures with women and try to improve their situation will instead try to protect their fragile egos by passing the blame onto somebody else.
It’s always somebody else’s fault but never their own.
It’s always easier to blame others than to accept responsibility for your failures with women.
Like the guy that I mentioned previously, he made excuses so that he didn’t need to change and put in any work to improve himself and become more attractive to women.
Instead, when things didn’t go his way, he blamed it on the girls.
“I can’t believe how stuck up and full of themselves Vietnamese girls are.”
Oh no, it couldn’t possibly be that your profile suck assed, you were sending girls boring plain generic messages, or that you targetted girls that spoke no English at all 🤦♂️.
Frankly, I’m getting quite sick and tired of hearing about guys like this whining and complaining about it like a little baby or spoiled child that doesn’t get what they want.
They make it sound like the world owes them something and that it revolves around them.
The world doesn’t owe you shit!
Want that hot chick that you see at the party?
Well then you better hope that your value is at least the same level if not higher than hers.
And if it isn’t, then you got a lot of work to do then.
Want something out there?
Go out there and prove that you deserve it.
And until you’ve put in the work to prove that you deserve it, you don’t deserve shit.
Foreigner Entitlement Issues
For some reason or another, some foreign men that arrive here in Vietnam or are planning to come here seem to have this sense of entitlement as if they deserve special preferential treatment just for being a foreigner.
This means things like:
- Not bothering to learn the local language and expecting everyone to be able to speak perfect English with them and then throwing a hissy fit when they struggle to communicate with people
- Expecting to get preferential treatment where ever they go and then getting angry when they are treated just like everybody else
- Expecting girls to worship them because they are a foreigner and be available at their beck and call
- Expecting girls to just come over to their hotel room without even taking the girl out on a few dates and then getting angry when she refuses to come over
- Expecting to put in the least amount of work but expecting maximum returns
Outside of Asia, I’ve never witnessed such level of entitlement before in my life.
Here’s another example:
Dude moves out into the countryside, and then whines and complains that he can’t get dates because none of the women that reside in the countryside speak English. He then makes excuses that he can’t meet women the traditional way because he doesn’t “have time” and has to work a lot.
His follow-up comment:
The guy makes excuses as to why he can’t or isn’t willing to put in the work to learn Vietnamese even though he’s been living in Vietnam for the past 2.5 years now yet he is “encouraging” other people to learn English to accommodate his over-entitled ass.
He then gets ripped a new one and called out for being a spoiled over-entitled brat that thinks he’s special.
A lot of his issues could have been alleviated if he actually tried to do something to improve his situation:
- Learn Vietnamese
- Move to a bigger larger city where English levels are better
- Make time to go out there and meet women the traditional way
But rather than trying to fix his problems, he switched over to the blame game and made excuses.
It’s always the same thing over and over again, excuse after excuse after excuse.
I can’t do this or that because I don’t (insert excuse), but people should be more accommodating to me because I’m a foreigner here.
High-Value Men Never Complain About Dating
Don’t you find it kind of funny that it’s always the low-value males that are always the ones that complain about the women here in Vietnam?
You never hear the high-value guys complain about any of this type of stuff because they are too busy killing it on the dating scene here in Vietnam.
They have too many girls chasing after them that they have trouble fitting them all into their schedule.
And here’s the thing, you don’t even need to be that high-value to snag yourself a decent woman.
I’ve seen more than plenty of guys that were either fat, balding, old, shy, or lack social skills and they still got dates here!
To further illustrate my point, each year thousands of men come to Vietnam in search of a bride or girlfriend and have no problems finding a bride.
According to an article from CNA, there are over 100,000 Vietnamese women in China that are married to Chinese men.
In another article published on Taiwan News, nearly 100,000 Vietnamese brides have been residing in Taiwan since 2017, and more than 20,000 Vietnamese brides moved to Taiwan since 2007.
In South Korea, there were 23,773 international marriages in 2018, and 30% of those marriages were with a Vietnamese woman which amounts to about 7132 total marriages between a South Korean man and a Vietnamese woman.
And this is just 3 countries that I randomly selected in Asia, I am not even counting all of the other countries in Asia such as Japan, Singapore, Malaysia, or anywhere else in the world such as the USA, Canada, Australia, etc.
Taken together you’ve got tens of thousands, possibly even hundreds of thousands of men that have no problems getting girlfriends or wives in Vietnam!
Hell, I even saw a creepy guy that was going around spam approaching girls until he was asked by security to leave a shopping center get more than a handful of dates and this guy was creepy as hell and had poor social skills too.
If all of these men have no problems getting dates and finding a wife including that spam approaching moron whose borderline autistic and creepy, then all of these guys that whine and complain about it shouldn’t either, but they do.
The answer is simple, the problem stems from the guy, not from Vietnamese girls.
The Game Plan of a Low-Value Male
Here are some of the things that you typically low-value males do that shoot themselves in the foot when attempting to get laid here in Vietnam.
Zero Game, a Tonne of Arrogance and Entitlement
I chuckle when I read comments left on my social media or comments on the site from sad disgruntled men that struck out with Vietnamese girls.
It’s always the same comments and playing the victim:
“Vietnamese girls are stuck up!”
“Vietnamese girls are cold and rude.”
“Vietnamese girls act all snobby and are full of themselves.”
But what you never see or hear about was how crappy their game was or rather… lack of game.
In 99% of the time, the guy is usually a low-value male that brings absolutely nothing to the table except for the fact that he’s a foreigner.
Usually, their game involves messaging a handful of girls and inviting them over directly to their place.
And when the girls refuse to do so (how dare she not come over at my beck and call!), these guys whine and complain about how stuck up and snobby the girls are but in reality, though, they have no game whatsoever and are low-value males.
Girls can easily sniff out low-value guys from the lot easily as if it’s a sixth sense or something. That’s why most girls always gravitate towards the high-value guy and fight tooth and nail to lock him down.
Here’s my personal experience with one of these lazy and over-entitled guys here in Vietnam.
I remember one time, I ran into a buddy of mines here in Saigon while I was out doing my usual afternoon routine.
He was with one of his friends who I never saw before.
Upon first impression, his friend gave off a hobo bum-like feel.
The guy dressed like a lazy slob and his wardrobe consisted of a dirty sweat-stained t-shirt, some cargo shorts, and flip flops.
But that wasn’t the biggest thing that caught my attention, it was his whole demeanor, everything from the way he talked to his body gestures.
He even had trouble stringing together a perfect sentence and seemed lost, dazed, and confused as if he was hungover or high on drugs or something.
This guy literally could have been mistaken for some hobo that you find down on Nguyen Hue street holding up a sign that says please donate to my travel around the world fund.
To put it simply, he was a low-value male who was trying to take advantage of his foreigner status to get laid here without actually putting in any of the work.
A few months later, one day my buddy told me about an incident he had with his friend.
He had known this guy for a while now, but didn’t have the chance to see this side of him until now.
One evening while out with his buddy at a store, his buddy decided it was a good idea to grope a Vietnamese girl’s ass while she was shopping.
Naturally, the girl got frightened and scared and my friend had to jump in to do damage control.
When my friend confronted his friend about this, his friend claimed that had this act been committed in another country then it would have been more than acceptable and even welcomed by the women there but here the women are just too stuck up and cold to fully appreciate his level of confidence and boldness in the art of ass grabbing strangers while out in public.
Does anyone know of any country in the world where groping unsuspecting women while they are shopping is considered an attractive move by a man?
I would bet that the guy would sooner get a huge slap across his face and maybe even get escorted off by police then getting her number.
But rather than admit error in his judgment and look to correct it, he instead placed the blame on the victim.
This guy had convinced himself that what he did was perfectly right and that it was instead the Vietnamese girl’s fault for not realizing how much of a stud he was.
No, it couldn’t possibly be that he was downright creepy and had zero game whatsoever, not to mention potentially breaking the law and sexually harassing someone.
It was all the girl’s fault!
She’s such a stuck up bitch!
How dare she reject my sexual advances!
He blamed it all entirely on the girl.
Rather than learning from his experience to improve his level of game, he instead copped out and blamed it all on other people and refused to change his ways.
You can’t help someone whose too lazy to help themselves.
And this is a trait that is unfortunately present in a lot of these men that complain about the women here in Vietnam.
Let’s refer back to the groping ass grabber guy that I talked about above.
Not only was his game completely off while out in public and in real life, but it was equally as awful online and reeked of laziness.
In his futile and pathetic attempts to mate with a Vietnamese female, he had attempted to message no more than 3-5 girls online on a dating website.
Now if you know anything about dating then you would realize that this is simply too small a number when trying to meet women, especially online where girls get bombarded with hundreds of messages every day.
So this guy was already at a huge disadvantage just due to sheer laziness.
But then he completely shot himself in the foot by asking for the girls to come directly over to his place, without ever even having met any of them before.
Naturally, not a single girl agreed to come over to his place and so he went on a long rant self-proclaiming that Vietnamese girls are snobby, cold, and rude, and that Vietnam was a shithole.
Talk about having a fragile ego and trying to protect it!
But he isn’t the only one like this, I’ve seen plenty of other guys that employ the same tactics.
There was a website (now-defunct) where the author showed screenshots of him inviting girls directly over to his place on Vietnamcupid who he never met before and getting shot down every time.
He blamed it on the girls 🤣.
I occasionally get comments on my social media from guys also saying the same thing.
It’s always the same pattern.
Guy is too lazy and cheap to get his ass off of his couch at home and meet the girl out on a date and so he figures he’d just invite her directly over to his place.
It’s quick, easy, and doesn’t cost him any money.
Typical thought pattern of a low-value male that sucks value from people.
Coming to Your Own Rescue
In a lot of the cases where men strike out with women, the underlying factors that caused them to fail could have been addressed.
- Put more effort into your appearance
- Stop putting crap into your body and taking better care of your body
- Spend time to learn more about the local culture
- Spend some time to learn the local language
- Read books on game and practice it out in the field
- Learn how to be more charming and have interesting and fun conversations with women
- Have a decent job
- Having social skills
- Taking showers regularly
All of these things would have given the guy a huge leg up when it comes to dating and made them much more attractive to girls but of course, it’s too much effort for them so why bother.
I’m just going to go message girls online and hope that eventually one of them agrees to come over to my place for sex 🤦♂️.
Everyone wants results instantaneously but no one is willing to put in any of the work.
It’s the same reason why you got all these mail-order bride websites and marriage agencies popping up all over the place in Southeast Asia.
Low-value dudes that are too lazy to put in any of the damn work that all want smoking hot wives and results instantly.
They then go cry foul when they get cheated or scammed and try to play the victim.
Well tough luck man.
There was a documentary that was released several years back which followed the journey of a bunch of low-value males that were completely clueless about women that decided that it was a great idea to go on a love tour in Ukraine to look for a wife.
Guess what happened to most of the men?
Nearly every single guy that was showcased got scammed except for 2 guys.
But the thing that stood out the most to me in particular, was one guy on the show.
He was some old dude (50+) that must have weighted nearly 300lbs or something that spent his free time sitting on his ass at home playing video games and collecting action figures who actually felt that he was entitled to a hot 20 something-year-old chick.
This guy was completely delusional on what he could get based on his sexual market value.
And despite going on this tour and having the opportunity to meet many girls, he became fixated on this one particular girl who naturally wasn’t attracted to him meanwhile still being scammed online.
I mean come on, why would some hot 20 something-year-old chick be sexually attracted to some fatass obese dude that spends his free time playing video games and collecting action figures?
If you want a girl like that then you yourself better be high value as well.
But a lot of guys are like that and feel entitled to having a hot piece of ass without putting in any of the work.
And then when you highlight these things to them, they typically get all butthurt about it and then start getting angry at you for showing them that the problem lies with them rather than external factors.
It’s always somebody else’s fault but never them.
Victim blaming seems to be the default go-to option for a lot of men nowadays whenever they strike out with women.
Rather than putting in the work to forge themselves into attractive guys that make women go gaga around them, most guys look for shortcuts to cheat the process.
And naturally, when this doesn’t work, they shift the blame onto other people.
It’s always easier to blame some chick for being a stuck up bitch rather than putting down that bag of Doritos and getting your fatass to the gym or throwing away all of your video games and actually going out to the real world and developing social skills.
Every guy wants results, but very few are willing to put in the work to get those results.
In the end, this just means more dating options for those guys that aren’t lazy and willing to put an effort towards improving themselves and turning themselves into those high-value guys that women just can’t get enough of.
Don’t make excuses, take action, and the world is your oyster.