Online Dating pitfalls in vietnam


When it comes to online dating, Vietnam has it pretty good for men.

Good ratios of females to males, beautiful feminine conservative girls, and realistic expectations on what to expect in a partner.


Vietnam ain’t perfect and there are still some flaws that need to be ironed out.

On your journey towards finding a beautiful feminine loyal Vietnamese girl that you can hopefully build a life with, you will need to content with a few issues plaguing the online dating realm in Vietnam.

Scammers, time wasters, girls moonlighting in questionable jobs will inevitably show up on the road towards finding miss right.

On today’s article, I will discuss some online dating pitfalls in Vietnam that you will most likely encounter at some point or another while dating girls in Vietnam online.

Girls Not Serious About Dating

Online dating pitfalls in Vietnam: Vietnamese girl sad by the phone

Its unfortunate that this trend has made its ways onto the shores of Vietnam from the west but nowadays you will often times find a lot of girls that aren’t serious about dating. This is especially true on certain apps such as Tinder or Badoo where there’s no real financial investment on the girl’s part and she can just signup for a free account to start talking with men.

A lot of men get easily fooled and think the girl’s somewhat enthusiastic replies indicates interest, which couldn’t be further from the truth.

What ends up happening instead is the guy is strung along and used as free attention for the female for as long as she can get away with it.

Having a bad day at work?

No problem, she’ll just hop on Tinder and have 20 guys all flirting with her and telling her how beautiful and smart she is.

What a great way to boost one’s ego!

Is it any wonder then that she has no incentives to meet up with any of these guys?

They freely give their attention away to her without asking for anything in return.

Research in recent years has brought this to light, although it wasn’t something that was a new revelation to me or anything.

According to a study conducted from Norwegian University of Science and Technology in Trondheim, that looked at the differences between sexes on the use of pictured based mobile dating apps, researchers found the following:

“Women use dating apps to feel better about themselves more than men do.”

Dr Mons Bendixen

In another study conducted by Lend EDU, researchers that interviewed college students that comprised mainly of millennials, found that 44.44% of them were using Tinder for the following reason “confidence-boosting procrastination“.

To further hit this point home, here is another classic example of this, whereby the author is boasting about using Tinder to boost her ego while stringing men along and feels zero remorse about it.

As more and more of western imported ideology or dare I say degeneracy makes its way onto the shores of Vietnam, expect more and more girls to adopt these behaviors as well.

I’ve had girls that I spent several hours talking with, trying to warm them up for a meetup, only for them later to make up some lame excuse as to why she doesn’t have zalo or facebook or use any social media, which I know is utter BS!

I once had a female that I was talking with from Tinder who I managed to transition over to Zalo. When I asked for the meetup, she kept on making excuses and she told me there was no need for a meetup yet was more than happy to continue chatting with me so I replied “Your right, then there’s no need to continue this conversation either.” and deleted her number.

Nowadays I usually try to get the girl over to a messaging app as soon as possible. Anytime she tries to put the brake on things I consider it a red flag.

And once we start talking on the messaging apps and if she refuses to meetup or makes excuses, then I immediately withdraw my attention from her and tell her to get back in touch with me if she changes her mind and end the conversation there.

A few of the girls will get back in touch with you and be willing to meetup because you’ve just passed their tests but the rest won’t and that’s perfectly fine because she just saved me from investing and wasting even more of my time on her that I could have used to pursue someone else.

She knows that if she wants more attention then she will need to meetup with me on a date, otherwise it’s bye bye attention.

You shouldn’t need to be chatting with her months on end before she decides to give you her Zalo.

Most girls that are serious about dating will gladly hand you her contact details within a few hours of chatting.

Likewise, it shouldn’t take you months to get a girl out on a date. It should happen within a week, probably a few days at most if she’s really interested and serious about dating.

Its only girls that are looking at stringing men along for free attention or other resources that try to delay the dating game.

I have a firm belief that if more and more men had the guts to call out women that tried to string them along then this type of behavior would quickly vanish.

Girls Using Men to Boost Their Instagram Followers

Online dating pitfalls in Vietnam: girl using tinder to get instagram followers
Follow me on instagram
Online dating pitfalls in Vietnam: girl using okcupid to get instagram followers

This is another deviant form of the time wasters that I discussed above whereby girls will go and join an online dating site with the sole intention of stringing men along to become her instagram and social media followers.

Her only goal for joining a dating website is so that she can grow her instagram following, and nothing more.

The men sadly are so desperate and thirsty to try and get with the girl that they convince themselves that if they join her legion of orbiters that they will have a shot with her.

Unfortunately for them, they soon join her male fanboy club where they will practically like every single one of her photos or leave her cringe worthy comments telling her how pretty she is and that they would be the luckiest man alive to get a date with her.

Most of the girls that you encounter that have profiles that mention anything about messaging her or following her on instagram should immediately be chunked into the dumpster.

A lot of these girls won’t even bother replying back to you on any of these dating platforms and if they do, its usually something along the lines of “I don’t come on here often, follow me/DM me on instagram.”

That’s when you know she’s trying to dupe you into enrolling in her little fan club.

Girls Looking for Sugar Daddies

Online dating pitfalls in Vietnam: Gold digger

If your coming from the west and used to online dating there, then prepare yourself…

Gold digging behavior in online dating is at a completely new level over here, especially on certain apps such as tinder, and badoo.

Some girls are blatantly putting on their profile that they are looking for a sugar daddy or someone that is “generous.” which is slang for sugar daddy.

Now I know poverty levels are much higher over here in Vietnam, but when you got girls that just sit on their ass all day, playing on their brand new iphones meanwhile demanding that you take them on expensive vacations at 5 star resorts while flying business class, and expecting a monthly stipend to maintain their current lifestyle, that ain’t poverty, that’s gold digging!

Normal Vietnamese girls realize the negative connotations of having a subset of gold digging Vietnamese girls and the great shame they bring towards their reputation and detest these types of girls, however its business as usual for these gold diggers as their only sole focus in life is to extract as much financial resources as possible from their victims.

Now if you do most of your dating outside of the online dating realm, then you probably won’t run into as many of these girls and will probably be meeting the more normal Vietnamese girls.

However, if you do decide to partake in online dating, just know that there is a sizable chunk of girls that are only interested in your wallet.

Scammers Are Prevalent

Since online dating offers a sense of Anonymity, a lot of scammers choose to use it as an avenue for finding their victims.

If you do any sort of online dating for a while here, I can almost guarantee that you will encounter at least 1 dating scam here.

Popular scams you might encounter online include:

  • Catfishing: Whereby a perpetrator will impersonate an online persona to lure and entrap a victim by forming an online relationship with them. Trust is build over time until the scammer feels its time cash in on their victim.
  • Asking for money: A very common scam. Some less intelligent scammers will blatantly ask for money outright, while more seasoned scammers will take their time to gain your trust first.
  • Identity theft: Your photos, identity may be used in a catfishing scam. Ever see those dating profiles of those male pilots or military officers? Did you really think those men had trouble getting laid?
  • Greencard chaser scams: Your typical girl that is ready to marry you in a heartbeat in the hopes of moving abroad for a better life and your her meal ticket.

If you ever suspect that your involved in a catfishing scam, ask the girl to videochat with you and give her actions to do on camera for you. Sometimes scammers use pre-recorded clips to fool guys.

Anytime a woman that your seeing starts asking you for money, alarm bells should be ringing in your head. Aside for paying for food/drinks/movie tickets on dates, a Vietnamese girl should not be asking you for any money.

Lastly, take your time when dating a Vietnamese girl rather then rushing to get married.

Seeking love is a marathon not a sprint!

Working Girls Seeking Clients Online

Just like their cousins the gold diggers, some Vietnamese girls that you will find online will be a working girl.

However these girls are quite easy to spot. I think they make it easy on purpose so as to not cause any confusion for prospective clients.

Some signs to look out for include:

  • Excessive tattoos, especially around the calf and back
  • Wearing provocative clothing that draws attention
  • Photos of her at clubs drinking or smoking shisha while entertaining clients at tables

However, there are some dim-witted men out there, that as soon as they see a woman wearing a dress with a low cut neck line, the oxygen to their brains is suddenly cut off and they try to convince themselves that the girl is a non-working girl despite all of the evidence suggesting otherwise.

Just don’t an idiot like these men and you’ll be fine.

Girls Have Multiple Sponsors

Don’t think that just because your a foreigner that your special here.

In fact, if you met the girl online and she speaks good English, she probably has dated foreigners before you and some of those lovers may even still be lurking in the background.

She may very well have 3-4 or maybe even 5 different guys on rotation that each send her gifts/money on a monthly basis + 1-2 lovers that she sleeps with regularly.

The trick is, she only sees these men like 1-2 times a year when they either arrive in Vietnam for vacation or she goes on vacation in their home country. That’s why its hard to find out whether or not she’s seeing other people behind your back.

But there are ways to spot this…

If you notice that she likes to take frequent trips abroad alone yet works a low paying job, then something is up.


If she suddenly starts sporting the latest iphone or can afford to eat at upscale restaurants often, then there’s a good chance someone else is forking the bill for these things.

Gold digger asking for sponsor to buy her a new iphone
Loose Translation: Mk (Michael?) Mk, I really like this. Please hurry up and buy this gift for me.

Girls Using Men for English Practice

Vietnamese girl looking to use men to practice English

Girls that fall under this category are another pet peeve of mine.

They know that these sites are used strictly for dating yet choose to ignore this and then get offended when someone tries to ask them out on a date.

Some of the girls are upfront about their true intentions and usually state it somewhere on their profile while others don’t write a single thing about their true intentions. I usually either try to convert the girl immediately and frame things romantically rather than platonically. Some of the girls will drop off at this point which is fine because I don’ want to be wasting my time being someone’s free English tutor anyway, however the ones that stay have now accepted your frame that you will take things in a romantic direction with them.

I wouldn’t waste more than a few hours with these girls if they aren’t willing to accept my frame.

A lot of men make the mistake of convincing themselves that they can turn all of these girls into romantic leads, thereby pouring more and more time into trying to change her mind, when instead that time could have been used to pursue someone else that was ready and open to the idea of dating.

It’s kind of like trying to sell a hamburger to someone that wants to eat fried chicken.

You will waste countless hours trying to convince them to purchase it.


Trying to sell the hamburger to someone that wants to eat a hamburger.

Why make your life more complicated then it needs to be.

Get rid of her!

Lots of Fake Profiles and Questionable Dating Apps

Online scammer

On some dating apps such as Tinder, you will once in a while find some attractive female first pretending to be interested in you, only to later suggest that you switch to another app because she doesn’t use this app much.

The only problem is the second app requires you to get a paid membership and is obviously a scam.

When you suggest that she gives you her zalo/whatsapp/facebook/skype/number, etc, they make excuses and say they don’t use those.

Funny enough, one time I had two girls try that trick on me back to back in the span of two days.

I immediately called out girl #2 for trying to scam me and she unmatched me immediately.

Be careful of dating websites and apps that require you to purchase credits in order to read emails, see videos of members, or chat with them.

Often times its an employee masquerading as some attractive girl pretending to take an interest in you, to motivate you to continue purchasing credits to talk with them.

You should never signup for any dating service that doesn’t give you an option to send unlimited messages with members on at least a monthly basis!

Tonnes of Thirsty Men Inflating Women’s Egos Online

Thirsty men on facebook leaving comments for Vietnamese girls

If you’ve ever dated women in the west then you’ve no doubt become aware of how thirsty the men over there are.

Guys are practically lining up for miles just to get a shot with a woman, any woman regardless of her attributes.

Unfortunately these low value men have been making their way over here to Vietnam in recent years.

Once these men arrive here, they unleash their pent up thirst on unsuspecting local Vietnamese women, instantly blowing up their egos to new heights.

The girls most susceptible to this are the ones that can speak decent English.

A Vietnamese girl that was considered average by local standards instantly becomes an overnight sensation due to the constant validation these spineless men shower the girl with.

Little do these men realize that their poor supplicating behavior not only does not get them what they want, it also makes things a lot harder for every other guy as a collective when it comes to dating.

We’ve all seen the damage they have done to women’s ego’s in the west and now they are invading Vietnam too.

The only good news I can tell you is that due to the language barrier, the damage they are inflicting here is a lot less.

In fact, a lot of them soon realizing that their “exotic foreigner value and constant ass kissing” cannot get them what they want with the local women, quickly turn bitter and disgruntled, vowing never to return back to Vietnam again.

That’s why often times on these Vietnam foreigner facebook dating groups, you will see a lot of ex-members with greyed out names on the group who right before leaving the group, makes one final attempt to vent out their frustration on the local women due to their lack of results before disappearing into oblivion and looking for the next girl from another foreign country to ass kiss.

I believe the only way to address this issue of male thirst is to call out these guys for acting in such a thirsty way.

I mean just look at this.

Thirsty men commenting a girl on her looks

Have you ever seen such a pathetic sorry sight before in your life?

Grown ass men acting like little supplicating doormats just to receive some female attention.

How spineless can you get?

I used to have two friends that I knew since high school.

Friend A was your typical thirsty male while friend B had a bit of game.

I remember one time when friend B told me about how friend A had made a pass on his date at a nightclub and made out with her while friend B went to the washroom.

Friend A’s justification for doing it was “It was understood that he would be taking her home, therefore she was fair game at the club.”

Like seriously?

How low can you get?

Whatever happened to bros before ho$%?

He basically was ready to throw a decade old friendship out the window just to get a little action with some random broad.

Unfortunately friend B did not kick friend A to the curb, because I know if I was in his shoes, I would have immediately done it.

Thirsty men have no integrity!

They will sell their own mothers just to get with a female.

These guys give out free attention and validation to females just for the mere fact that she was born a female.

Not only is this a pathetic display of masculinity, it also has detrimental profound effects on dating dynamics for both sexes whereby skewing an otherwise balanced sexual market.

Misleading Photos

I’m sure in the west you’ve seen photos of girls who you thought were stunning only to later on have your jaw drop to the ground when you finally met them in person and they look nothing like their photos.

Well, Vietnam also has its fair share of girls uploading misleading photos on their online dating profiles as well in order to nap themselves a higher value male then what their worth.

I’ll discuss a view issues you will encounter in this area.


Acne on a woman's skin

Acne seems to be more prevalent in Vietnam compared to the west.

I would attribute this at least partially to the air pollution and dirt that is plaguing the country which causes a lot of the girls to develop acne due to their pores being clogged up full of dirt and other residue.

In a lot of photos, you will see girls with crystal clear skin with not a pimple in sight, however once you actually do meetup with the girl, suddenly its like a whole family of pimples just moved into her face.

Now I’m not the type of guy to fuss over a few blemishes here and there, but when a girl suddenly shows up with a face full of pimples despite her photos telling the contrary, that’s when I feel deceived and she probably won’t be seeing me again.

In fact that’s exactly what happened on one of my dates here a while back.

The girl showed up with a tonne of powdered makeup slapped on her face to hide the pimples and acne, but there was no hiding it.

To make matters worse, she had red lipstick stuck to her front teeth as well and was actually 6 inches shorter compared to her photos.

Talk about deception.

I never saw her again!

Padded Bras

Padded bras are a huge problem over here in Vietnam. A lot of girls seem to love wearing them.

Often times you would be out and about and see some girl with an amazing figure, but unbeknownst to you, she’s wearing a padded bra to give herself that extra leg up.

I remember one instance where I was fooled by a girl’s breast size.

I had met this one girl online who had taken quite a number of photos with cleavage. I was pleasantly surprised when I finally met her in person and she looked exactly like her photos with a generous sized rack. She took a few dates before I was able to get her back to my place.

However when I finally did manage to get her back to my place and her clothes came off, I was quickly taken aback and quite disappointed at what I saw.

She must have been a magician by trade because the size of her rack quickly shrank from a size C to a size A.

The culprit?

Her padded bra.


Vietnamese girls on average tend to be on the more petite size when compared to their western counterparts.

However, this won’t stop some girls from exaggerating their heights in photos to make themselves appear taller.

A classic example you will see of this are girls taking shots from the bottom up where she’s looking down or beside something very small.

Another way she may make herself appear taller in photos is by wearing 6 inch heels that you never see.

I once had a date with a girl who I thought was going to be somewhere in the ballpark of 5’3 but when she showed up, she was nearly a half foot shorter and wore giant heels.

The girl also had braces on, which she never let in based on her photos.

I guess there was a reason why she never smiled in her photos.

Now I just want to say there’s nothing wrong with dating shorter girls, and in fact I have dated girls that were much shorter then me.

However, when a girl starts using misleading photos to deceive you into thinking that she’s a lot taller then she really is, that’s when issues arise.


In previous articles, I talked about all of the great things associated with online dating in Vietnam. For starters, the quality is much better over here compared to the west, girls are slim and feminine, and ratios are generally quite good.

However there are a few online dating pitfalls in Vietnam when it comes to dating that you should be aware of. These include:

  • Girls Not Being Serious About Dating
  • Girls Using Men to Boost Their Instagram Followers
  • Girls Looking for Sugar Daddies
  • Scammers Are Prevalent
  • Working Girls Seeking Clients Online
  • Girls Have Multiple Sponsors
  • Girls Using Men for English Practice
  • Lots of Fake Profiles and Questionable Dating Apps
  • Tonnes of Thirsty Men Inflating Women’s Egos Online
  • Girls Using Misleading Photos

But despite these drawbacks, when compared to dating in the west you still come out on top.

Just keep your wits about you and you’ll do fine here, hell you’ll do more than just fine 😉.

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